Group photo? Rarely will they NOT be in the middle. Somebody enjoying themselves in a room, and subsequently gaining attention due to it? Best watch your knees, pal, if Little Miss Attention Whore is within earshot.
The Wikipedia definition of Narcissism is as follows:
Narcissism is a term with a wide range of meanings, depending on whether it is used to describe a central concept of psychoanalytic theory, a mental illness, a social or cultural problem, or simply a personality trait. Except in the sense of primary narcissism or healthy self-love, "narcissism" usually is used to describe some kind of problem in a person or group's relationships with self and others. In everyday speech, "narcissism" often means egotism, vanity, conceit, or simple selfishness. Applied to a social group, it is sometimes used to denote elitism or an indifference to the plight of others. In psychology, the term is used to describe both normal self-love and unhealthy self-absorption due to a disturbance in the sense of self.
I'd like to abridge that definition, just a tiddly bit:
Narcissism is a term with a wide range of meanings, but usually describes somebody who is magnetically attracted in a creepy, unhealthy manner to the proverbial spotlight and acts out like a worthless bitch-made punk when all eyes are NOT upon them.
I'm not 100% sure if Wikipedia will accept that description.
The interesting thing about Little Miss Attention Whore is the timing of the action. She will sit docile and without response UNTIL action is initiated by a second party upon a third party, with the third party being a person, several persons, or a group of people. Once the action is in play, such as an interesting story, sharing something funny, or simply pleasant banter, Little MAW fires up her supercharger and swings into action. Subtlety is a non art in her realm, as she leaps in to the discussion with only one rule in mind: The spotlight must NEVER waver from illuminating her and her only, no matter how loud, intrusive, or annoying she must become.
You cannot battle her head on: She's adorable and irreverent, far more than you, which offers her the eye-test advantage.
You cannot one-up her. It will simply appear you're artificially attempting to best her group-accepted natural tendencies.
You cannot work around her by discussing topics she hasn't a clue about. She'll simply segue your topic into her topic with the simplest of tactics: "I don't wanna talk about Quantum Particle Theory! Let's talk about Glee last night!... OMG!!!"
You cannot confront her. She'll spread stories about you.
You cannot spread stories about her. People will turn against you.
You can ignore her, since the entire point of her existence is "attention", which will in turn agitate her to the point of notching up the volume of her antics to 11.
And, of course, you cannot kill her. For as incessantly selfish as she may be, murder is NEVER the answer.
What you CAN do, however, is create a website where one can hire your very own Little MAW to directly combat the girl. Fight her on even terms, with the same weapons, in the same manner. Like a hitman... or a hitMAW!!! For $500, you can select a woman closely resembling your MAW's description, and deliver to her the marching orders. Then, kick back and enjoy the show as your personal "hitmaw" enters the establishment and takes command of the room. She's cuter than Little MAW, as well as funnier, smarter, and faster in her speak, offering little to no space between thoughts to drop a monkeywrech of contention. Soon, Little MAW is a spectator, standing in the fringes of the audience darkness. In the span of 30 minutes, her dominance has been broken, and her reign shattered.
The price also includes several follow-up sessions to re-educate your Little MAW by burnishing into her psyche her new place on the pecking order -- which would be 2nd place. Soon after, if she acts up, merely mention the name of that sexy stranger who strolled in that day to set her off on a free fall of paranoia and uncertainty... like a command to a dog. Hours of fun.
Coming soon -- www.hitMAW.com
"A small price to pay for freedom (from attention whores)".
....?
Gotta work on that catchphrase.
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